Here's a partial re-post from 2007--concerning (football) bowl season, which doesn't make any sense even in the culture to which in belongs (American):
Bowls I would like to see played, to make "bowl season" more interesting:
The Despair Bowl, featuring the two worst teams in college football.
Different faith-traditions could sponsor this bowl and offer hope to the
teams and their long-suffering fans.
2. The Absurdity Bowl, in
which, if a team "scores," points are subtracted, not added. So if a
team scored a lot, the scoreboard would read "-58" or something like
that. The defenses would attempt to let the offenses score; they would
be hospitable, polite, and supportive. The offenses would be
inoffensive, reticent, and shy.
3. The Don't Go To War Unless
It's Absolutely Necessary Bowl, featuring teams from the military
academies. Before the game, all in attendance would pray in their own
fashion that the players would never have to see military action and
especially not have to suffer wounds or get killed in combat, ever.
The Poetry Bowl, in which players from the two teams would choose
their favorite poems and read them aloud to the crowd during the four
timed quarters. There would be a half-time, during which the teams could
change their strategies and consult different anthologies. Judges
would determine which set of poems was more interesting and which team
gave better readings. All the players would earn academic credits in
English at their respective universities.
5. The Zen Bowl,
featuring no teams, only spectators, who would file in and look at the
empty field. Cheerleaders representing no teams would "cheer" silently.
The Interpretation Bowl. This would be an ordinary football game, but
on television, you could select different commentators to describe and
interpret the game. The menu would include political scientists,
feminist scholars, anthropologists, game-theorists, mathematicians,
physicists, psychologists, and so forth. Everyone at home would get the
deeper meaning of their choice.
7. The Out Bowl. This would be
a game between two teams composed of players from all teams across the
nation--perhaps East and West. Players would be invited to come out as
gay, but no player would be outed without his permission. One aim would
be to assemble enough gay players to field two teams. Another aim would
be to help the United States get over its homophobia and realize that
about 10 per cent of any given group--including athletes--is gay.
(Consider the appeal of gladiator-movies.) I predict that this Bowl
will not occur soon.
8. The Soup Bowl. Innumerable corporate
sponsors would support this Bowl lavishly, but all the profits would go
to feeding the homeless, who would be able to attend the game for free
(if they so desired), after a good meal, a hot shower, and a fresh
change of clothes.